Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Ghost Town

Lately, I have been feeling like I live in a ghost town. The ghosts I am encountering are not of the "Casper-the-Friendly-Ghost" persuasion.

No, these are the ghosts of relationships past.

Now, when I accepted my job at The Chariot, I knew that I was going to be working closely with The Charioteer. I've gotten used to seeing him on a daily basis. Do I love the fact that when I stand up in my cube, I look directly into his cube? Eh, not so much.

I also knew I'd occasionally see The Deux. We don't see each other all that frequently since he works two floors above me. I actually haven't seen him much since the whole Two Exes and a Wedding experience. Which is nice - I mean, a girl can only handle so many run-ins with her exes right?

Well, I clearly hadn't hit my quota for June.

Let me set the scene for you. I had just finished a hot, sweaty 6 mile run with my running group on Sunday morning and decided to treat myself to a post-run iced tea. So I pretty much couldn't have looked worse. I walk towards the coffee shop and see a guy entering the store and think - hmm, that guy looks familiar. He turns back and I realize - oh wait, that's the freaking Dog Whisperer. Remember him? The guy I dated last fall who basically stood me up one night and then proceeded to fall off the face of the earth ?

We both pretended not to notice each other and he exited out of the back of the store, so luckily we didn't have to exchange words.

Even though he was such an insignificant person in my life, it still rattled my cage to see him. My heart was racing and my hands were shaking as I handed over my debit card to pay for my drink. And I was cursing the fact that he saw me looking like that - and not in a cute, summer dress, sans post-workout sweat.

As I was driving home, I thought of a quote from the lovely Carrie Bradshaw. It's from the episode where she sees Aidan at the Grand Opening of Steve's Bar:

“New York is definitely haunted. Old lovers, ex-boyfriends, anyone you have unresolved issues with you are bound to run into again and again until you resolve them.”

I know having a brief encounter with an old flame is not a big deal. I know I will never get closure or an explanation for his Houdini disappearance. And that is fine. It just makes me feel like maybe my city is getting just a little bit too small sometimes.

Lesson learned - no more post-run beverages at this coffee shop.

Do you ever feel like your world is becoming smaller? Maybe it's in a good way and you run into people you want to see. Maybe it's in a not-so-good way and you run into old boyfriends or friends you've grown apart from?

23 comments:

Charbelle said...

If anyone should have felt awkward HE should have not yet. Although I totally get hating the fact that you had just finished a run and had the after run "glow" (translation salt accumulated on your face and your hair a wet mess)going on.
I often feel like my city is very small!

qwerkyqook said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
qwerkyqook said...

Ha. I love that SATC has a perfect quote for every life situation. I bet he was embarrassed by his childish behavior and thus ducked out through the back door. I'm sure you looked strong and healthy after your run, and he couldn't say the same for himself!

Abby said...

OH!!! My!! God!!! What the hell!!! There are SO many people that live in the Minneapolis metro area. How did you run into THAT?!?! I am sooo sorry, Lisa! Uck!

Wow. Wow. Wow.

I do feel like this world is too small at times. And I don't feel it's in a good way. I never run into people I want to see. It's always someone I'm dreading - and all I want to do is hide, crawl into a wall.

Kyla Roma said...

My world isn't becoming smaller, it IS small! lol I hate running into old exes, even 5+ years since I've been dating at all it still rattles me a bit. It's not a fun experience at all, especially if you're not feeling on top of your game.

But it happens to *everyone* and being exactly who you are - strong, beautiful & independent - will draw people to you :)

abbi said...

Oh...those types of situations stink. I've lived in small towns all my life so those types of situations happen frequently. Sounds like he was a little rattled as well for quickly exiting out the back!

Emily Jane said...

Oh no!! I do feel like the world is too small sometimes - I hate running into people I REALLY have no desire to see at ALL. On Friday I went out to see a show and it was in an open-air theatre, so I wore jeans, trainers,long sleeves and a hoodie and just threw my hair up (which looks terrible!) despite it being +26 because of all the mosquitoes. Got VERY warm and sweaty lol... I looked ridiculous and of course... I ran into an Ex there. Who was IN THE SHOW. And we were sitting second row!! :(

pinkflipflops said...

I live far too close to my hometown. It sucks. ;) Also, don't stop going there because of him. Obviously you made him uncomfortable too. You just need to go in and smile and say something snarky like, 'oh you're alive? i thought you'd die, because no way would a gentleman just fall of the earth.' insert hair toss and walk away. ;)

Amber (Girl with the red hair) said...

I feel like the WORLD is too small. When I go back home I don't like to go out to the bar because I see wayyyy too many people from my past and when I was in high school!

Mandy said...

My world IS pretty small and lately I'm feeling that its getting too small as well. I was ok with that for a really long time, but now, not so much. I can relate to the feeligns that you're having.

Jess said...

I live in a small city, so when N. and I first broke up, I was worried about running into him often. The funny thing is, I see his family on a pretty regular basis, but I never, ever see him. I've come to the conclusion that he avoids downtown, knowing that I live and work there. I'm good with that. I'd rather leave the past in the past.

Seriously though..what are the chances of you running into the Dog Whisperer? Pretty crazy. And, yes. It always happen at the exact time we wish it wouldn't - not when we're wearing cute summer dresses. That's life, I guess!

Nora said...

There are *still* parts of STL I refuse to go to because I'm afraid I'll run into certain exes and even though it was years ago that we dated, I'm just not comfortable with it.

I run into exes at my office, through friends, when randomly out at bars and no matter what, even if I'm happy and with someone, it's still super awkward. So I totally get how you feel.

Gracie (Complicated Day) said...

No! You looked all strong and awesome! I totally think people look hot after running. Plus it shows you're doing things with your life instead of sitting on your couch playing World of Warcraft.
I had a super-bad experience with a boyfriend who went from being handsome and charming to utterly psychotic in a matter of hours (I now believe he has bipolar disorder) and who I actually am afraid of. Unfortunately we lived in the same small town and I spent an enormous amount of effort going to different coffee shops and different libraries to avoid him. It was such a relief when I moved!

Becky said...

Ugh, running into anyone when you look like that is not cool, much less an ex! But maybe he was thinking "Damn, she looks good and obviously keeps in shape, I missed out!" :)

Leigh said...

I agree with Charbelle...he is the one that should feel super awkward about the whole thing as he is the one who just up and disappeared from your life.

The world is must smaller than we think...especially with the use of the internet

Jen said...

Not really. But maybe that's because I try to steer clear of any place my ex's may be ;-)

Did I know that you live in Mnpls too?? Did you get the MN/WI blogger girls invite? A few of us that live in the area getting together and finally meeting! Send me an email if you want to know more about it.

B and B said...

I'll bet he didn't need to even open the door to that coffee shop. Instead, he just slithered out UNDERNEATH the door, sluggishly. :)

Amber @ A Little Pink in the Cornfields said...

Ummm, yes. Des Moines is a big small town. Seriously, you cannot avoid anyone for very long here so I am basically mentally preparing myself for running into Cy someday. If that means looking adorable at all times in public, then so be it.
Hopefully it's not anytime soon though... I was shaking uncontrollably at just seeing his car yesterday.

Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks said...

I consider Chicago to be a pretty big metropolitan area and I've still had run-ins with people I don't want to see. I don't think it's where you live so much as the Universe sometimes wants you to experience certain things ... and has a way of making it happen.

Sassy Molassy said...

Lisa, I know it sucks to have an ex (who stood you up no less) see you all sweaty, but I think of it a little more positively. I think that he saw you after kicking some ass on a 6 mile run and you weren't afraid to be seen going to the coffee shop after you got your sweat on. But I also know that heart racing "ugggh" feeling. It sucks.

J said...

Ugg i hate running into people in public 1) when I am gross and 2) when I have unresolved stuff with them. It is just awkward! I still hate that guy for standing you up! Sometimes I am so sick of men!!

Marlys said...

I agree with Barb - he must have slithered under that door! Shows you what kind of man he was :(! He ran out because he couldn't face you after what he did!

Nicole said...

I agree with Charbelle - I bet he did feel totally awkward. Hence skirting out the back door. Love the Sex and the City quote, though. It's perfect.