Monday, November 21, 2011

10 Days of Thanksgiving: Day 8

Today I am thankful that I am an independent person.

I am really proud of the fact that I will go pretty much anywhere or do pretty much anything by myself.  Go to Paris for a week?  Sure, why not.  Take in a play or concert alone?  Sure.  Go to the movie theater?  Of course.

I wasn't always this way.  Like most people, I was not very comfortable being alone in my early 20s.  Then I studied abroad in Australia - without knowing a single person doing the same program - and things really started to change.  I experienced some major culture shock (and truth be told depression) when coming back from studying abroad, so at first it wasn't apparent that I had gained more of a sense of independence.  Slowly, but surely it started to show through.

These days, I relish time that I get to spend alone. I enjoy quiet nights of knitting, reading, playing piano and watching movies.  If I don't get some alone time, I start to feel off.  My body almost craves the calm and quiet of solitude.  

Of course, I do hope that my future does include a fabulous relationship, but I take comfort in the fact that I am enjoying my time alone while it last.  With the holidays upon us, it is actually nice to be single.  Sure, I miss out on the couples gift exchanged and the romance of the season, like ice skating or looking at Christmas lights with a boyfriend.  But then I listen to friends talk about the difficulties of splitting holidays, and I am actually happy that I am not forced to choose. I get to spend every holiday with my family and don't have to compromise.

Hopefully some day I will have a special guy in my life - and when and if that day comes, I will still make time to do things on my own. 

16 comments:

Marlys said...

I think we all need some quiet, private, alone time. I need that in order to pray and relish every second of it.

Amber (Girl with the red hair) said...

I enjoy quiet and alone time too, though with three people and two pets in one house I am rarely COMPLETELY alone these days :) But I really love mornings (like right now) when the boys are still sleeping and I can drink my coffee/read blogs/do whatever in quiet and peace!

I think it's wonderful how independent and self-sufficient you are!!

missris said...

I think it's great that you're so independent! And yes, the time splitting for holidays really sucks! I NEVER want to miss a holiday with my family, but it's not fair to make D miss every holiday with his family just so we can be with mine! So for now we're just apart for all the holidays, which sucks.

Leigh said...

I love having my own time too... I am definitely a person who needs time alone or else I start feeling all panicky and overwhelmed. For our wedding, I was pretty tired and sick of being around people by the end of the weekend!

I think it's great that you can travel alone...for some reason, that scares me. Possibly because I have the worst sense of direction ever!

Amber @ A Little Pink in the Cornfields said...

This is a really good one, Lisa! I'm thankful for the same thing. I'm not afraid to go anywhere by myself (I don't necessarily prefer it, but I will do it) and kind of feel bad for people that refuse to do anything by themselves!

Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks said...

I read this nodding in complete agreement. Sometime around the time I bought my first condo, I began to really enjoy me-time. All along, I knew things would change when (if!) I got married ... so, I took advantage while I had it. So glad you see the up-side of being single and independent. One day, you'll look back at this time in your life with fondness.

Scarlett Elliewood said...

I really like alone time and learning to love that is such an important part of becoming a happier, healthier person. Living abroad definitely makes you more independent as does running.

Kelly (She Wears a Red Sox Cap) said...

I used to be really, really independent (and still am in some ways, though I do get lazy more often haha) and going to Australia with no one I knew was definitely part of that. I really loved Australia but I also kind of realized that I can be independent NOT on the other side of the world haha.

I also am a person who really needs my alone time. I've come to think of time with Eric where we aren't really engaging with each other (like he's watching TV and I'm reading or on the computer) as some of my alone time, which I something I like about Eric- he knows when to leave me alone haha.

Finally splitting the holidays is terrible and you are right to be happy to be single this time of year- seriously! I'm glad to hear your friends complain about it being hard because sometimes I think we are the only ones who it is hard for. It's one of the only things in life we fight about.

Also, add to your list- being with someone means twice the number of obligations and in order to stay sane it's just not possible to maintain relationships (or at least not see each other a lot relationships) with everyone you did before when you are also trying to spend time with another person and his family and friends. +1 in the single column :)

crystal said...

I love this post. I fully believe that the best relationships are born of 2 people who have complete comfort in being alone. You have that down pat, and are relishing it. Don't take that lightly, few can actually pull it off!

Abby said...

I agree that quiet, alone time is nice to have. However, I'm not looking forward to the excessive alone time I'll be experiencing in March. No family or a husband for thousands of miles will certainly be an eerie feeling!

I think it's awesome you have such independence -- and how you plan these incredible trips.

Don't feel bad about the holidays. I'm married, and we don't ice skate or romantically look at Christmas lights ;).

Becky said...

I totally agree with this. I thought I was independent and with it and then I met you and I'm like "um she's a rockstar!" (And SO true about splitting holidays!

Mandy said...

I enjoy alone time too. Its fantastic that you are so independent.

Lauren @ Sassy Molassy said...

The manfriend and I actually had a little argument the other night bc I had scheduled a girls get together over Thanksgiving weekend without asking him if he wanted to come or what he wanted to do that weekend. I felt bad bc basically I was thinking as my old independent self and not as a person in a relationship. Sometimes I have a hard time remembering that I need to have conversations with him before just scheduling something. I often assume he wouldn't be interested in seeing my hs girlfriends (and their sig others) so I just don't say anything. Whoops!

Kyria @ Travel Spot said...

It's so nice to be comfortable in one's own skin. I think this is what will make you happy no matter what, and when you do have a guy, you will both be happier, because you know who you are and what you want and you're okay on your own. I think this makes for a healthy relationship, whether alone OR with someone else!

San said...

You have NO idea how much I can relate to this,.... NO IDEA!

After I did my exchange program in the US, I pretty much became a different person... and I am so independent now that I'll do pretty much ANYTHING on my own. It's such an accomplished feeling :)

Jolene - EverydayFoodie said...

Time on your own is very important :-) The hubby and I never have to worry about splitting holidays. We usually just have a Thanksgiving dinner with one family one day and the other the next. Christmas eve we do Christmas with my family, and Christmas day with the hubbies.