Friday, April 5, 2013

Thanks for the Memories

Well, the packing and removal of my belongings is complete, and it went very smoothly.  I don't really think I can find the words to do justice to the feelings I felt as I sat there and watched the movers box up my belongings and cart them away.  I am not going to sugar coat this experience.  At the end of the day as I walked around my empty apartment that I loved through-and-through, I felt as empty as it looked...  I knew it would be a hard day, but it was actually harder than I thought it would be.  But so it goes.

It is hard to believe my last weekend in Minneapolis has come.  For the most part this weekend came really fast - too fast, actually.  But in some ways, the last three months since I found out about this move has felt like one long goodbye.  I have tried to live in the moment as much as possible and have been fairly successful at doing this, but in the back of my mind, I was often thinking things like 'this is the last time I will do this,' 'this is the last time I will see this person before my move' etc etc.  I am really really sad to leave, but in some ways, I am ready for the move to be behind me as I am sort of tired of living in limbo.  I feel like I've metaphorically had one foot in Minneapolis and one foot in Charlotte for the past couple of months, so I am ready to have my feet firmly planted in one place.  Plus I am ready for the clock on my one year commitment to Charlotte to start ticking.


So much has happened in the last 10 years I've spent in Minneapolis.  I learned how to live on my own.  I had my heart broken and mended.  I got my MBA.  I started blogging and met this whole community of amazing people.  I became an aunt - 6 times!  I watched dear friends marry their soul mates.  I watched my sister marry her soul mate.  I became a faux-aunt to the children of friends.  I trained and ran my first marathon - and then two more.  I said goodbye to friends who moved onto new cities.  I met new friends.  I discovered my love for Paris and all things French.  I shared that love of France by starting the tradition of Julia Child Night with my aunt.  I passed the first two levels of the CFA. I bought a condo.  I became a landlord.  I figured out that I really am a city mouse.  I joined a running club and met a whole bunch of friends through that.  I tried different jobs and found the career path that was meant for me.  I figured out who I really am and what I value in a lifestyle.


The last 10 years had their fair share of difficult times.  But looking back, the good far outweighs the bad.  All of these experiences and memories have made me who I am today.  They are tucked away in my heart and I will carry them along on this journey I am taking.  10 years ago, I could not fathom moving across the country.  And certainly not alone.  But these things I will do.



On Sunday I will board my one-way flight to Charlotte.  There will undoubtedly be many tears shed, and while it's been a long goodbye, I really know in my heart that it's more of a 'see you later'.  It's a one way ticket, but I think of it more as an open-ended ticket.  I firmly believe there will be a return flight some day.  I don't know when and I don't really know where (Minneapolis?  Chicago?).  But, barring the highly unlikely scenario of me falling in love with the south, I feel confident that I will find my way back to the Midwest.



I know I have tough times ahead of me as I begin to adjust to my new home, but I also believe that, similar to the photo below, the clouds will part and the sun will shine through.  And, eventually, I will be ok.



See you later, Minnesota.  Thanks for the memories.

30 comments:

Kelly (She Wears a Red Sox Cap) said...

This post made me cry. Some part of me thinks moving to Charlotte may be better for you than this limbo you've been in and the dread of moving to Charlotte. This isn't to say I think you'll fall in love with it, but I just think you may be better with it than you think. Or maybe this is me just hoping :) I've been thinking about you and luckily all your blog friends are still just a whats app message/text/blog comment/e-mail away! (and a cheaper plane ride, wahoo!)

abbi said...

Wow, this is a pretty powerful post. I can only imagine what it felt like to see an empty apartment. Good luck on the next chapter as you make your way to Charlotte and settle into your new place.

J said...

:( I know words can't really help to make any of this better. I do hope that you at least enjoy the next year in Charlotte. You never know what is in store for you!

missris said...

*Hugs* I'm thinking about you, lady. You'll get through this.

Marlys said...

I am in tears, too! I know this has been especially difficult for you and I totally understand, but I do hope that this move will open up new doors that you never knew you would experience and that you will end up relishing this chapter in your "book of life"! Twelve months or so will go so fast! Be sure to open your heart to this new chapter and let the sun shine ni! I don't want you to miss the good things and if you let the cloud hang over you, you may miss them! Chin up, my dear, as my dear Dad always told us kids! I can still hear his voice as he said it!

Nora said...

So this totally made ME cry. You are such a beautiful woman, inside out, full of courage, bravery, heart, compassion, intelligence and a wonderful friend. Will be thinking of you so much over the coming weeks; always here for you! xoxox

Becky said...

I'm thinking about you so much this weekend. I want to tell you it will all be okay, but you're right, at first it's going to be hard. You'll get through, it's not forever, and who knows - there may even be some things you like about Charlotte!

Soak it up this weekend! xoxoxoxo

Barb Geier said...

Tough one to read, Lisa. I look forward to seeing pictures of Charlotte and hear how you are getting settled. Hopefully, the nice spring weather there will cheer your heart. I'll see you in June!!!

Hugs.

Leigh said...

Sending you big hugs today!

Amber said...

I am incredibly sad for you to be leaving a city you love so much but I'm also excited to follow you on this new adventure to Charlotte. I am hoping that it will pleasantly surprise you once you're there. I agree living in limbo is no fun and I think it will feel like a weight off your shoulders to finally be IN Charlotte, even though I know it's not what you truly want. Thinking of you lots this weekend and sending BIG hugs from afar. XO

Abby said...

Reading this put me in tears. I so understand that longing feeling if missing what your heart calls home. Goodbyes are so hard! Especially when you loved the life where it was.

Have a good weekend and safe travels. You will get through this! Love you and call if you need to vent, cry, or whatever!

Stephany said...

Oh, goodness. This post gave me chills and made me tear up. Minneapolis has been so good to you and has made you the woman you are today. Charlotte is an unexpected bump in the road and, though you may never grow to love the South, I'm hopeful it will lead to more experiences and happiness. It will be tough, but you have all the support of your family and the blog world to help you during this time! I can't imagine how difficult this must be. Sending you lots of hugs!

Caroline said...

Thinking of you this weekend, Lisa. We are all here for you during this transition, I really believe this 'in between' phase leading up to the move will be the hardest part. Once you're there, we can start planning your return .. or at least a visit from your fellow Bostonians : )

Tammy Roney said...

Excellent wording. This post brought tears to my eyes. I wish you the best in Charlotte.

Jeanie said...

Oh, Lisa, ever since I've begun following your blog, I have been so impressed with how you have grown and how openly you have shared your joys and concerns and let us join you in your journey.

You know we are right beside you as that journey continues. And yes, the limbo will be over. That always adds to the stress.

You are tough, lovely, generous, thoughtful, insightful and gracious -- those are all qualities you have shown and that will help you along your way. There are moments when I think it will be harder for those in your immediate Minneapolis orbit to cope with your departure than for you. Maybe a little of both.

Onward, my friend. You will find that time does indeed fly.

Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks said...

I'm kind of weepy reading this post, Lisa. I've hardly spent any time in Minneapolis, so it's not like I can relate to that very well. But, I feel like you've been so open about this big life change and the stress it's put on your life ... and I've shared the "life is so unfair to the nicest of people" sentiment ... and, well, I know it's hard not to be bitter and sad ... but, I know you well enough to know you're going to shine (who needs the sun for that!!!) and this little blip on your life radar is going to open up new doors and opportunities that will lead you to the rest of your life. Hug you.

Alli said...

I'm tearing up both because I hate that you're going through this and because you wrote a pretty beautiful love letter to Minneapolis and to your life over the past 10 years. As Nilsa said, this is just a blip on the radar screen and I know that ultimately you will be somewhere you love, living the fabulous life you deserve.

Also, as you know, I've always wanted to visit Minneapolis so pencil me in for summer/fall 2014 because I know you'll be back there by then and can host me!

Linda said...

Amazing milestones happened for you the last ten years! Lots of hugs to you.

San said...

You had a wonderful time in Minneapolis, so it's more than understandable that you're sad to leave... especially when it was not your own decision really.

I hope that finally being out of the limbo that you were in will console your heart and you'll start looking forward to making more beautiful memories in a new place.

<3

Shoshanah said...

Wishing you the best this weekend! I'm really hoping that this transition goes smoothly for you, and you start to fell more settled sooner rather than later.

Cherry Blossoms said...

I can't believe its moving weekend. I can't wait for you to get settled and into a new routine. I am sure the next year will go by fast and I just know you will do great on this new adventure!

Lauren @ Sassy Molassy said...

Beautiful post Lisa. I am tearing up.

The Many Thoughts of a Reader said...

(((())))

Raquelita said...

What a beautiful tribute to your city and to the self that you have been in that city, Lisa! I'm sending you lots of virtual hugs.

Lisa-Marie said...

Lisa, you write with such eloquence and truth. Mineapolis has been lucky to have you, and I know you'll make your mark on Charlotte. You are brsve and strong. The very best of luck to you!

Journey Authentically said...

What a great post. I hadn't realized it'd been TEN years there--that definitely does make it difficult to leave a place that has felt so solid, so final for so long. But as you said, I'm glad the move has officially arrived, so that the in-between period can end and the next stage can begin. I think (and hope) that it will have some good outcomes--maybe in more surprising ways than you could ever have imagined prior to moving. Sending lots of love your way. Safe travels today!

Jolene - EverydayFoodie said...

Awwww girl - hugs to you! This is a beautifully written post, but it makes my heart hurt for you.

Lesli said...

Good luck Lisa! It is all going to be okay--I just know it!!

Kyria @ Travel Spot said...

This is very well written; it really sums up what a chapter in your book MN has been. I am glad that you are out of limbo and ready to start your new chapter, come what may! I wish you the best!

Melissa said...

This made me teary-eyed, Lisa! I don't think I could ever move away from Montreal, not without knowing when I could come back. You're such a trooper and I really respect the decision you made for yourself here!