Hey there! Today is the day we close on our new house! It will be a hectic morning as we have Paul's teacher conferences at 8, the walk through at the new house at 9, and the closing at 10. Luckily everything is fairly close together! I'm looking forward to Paul's conference as it will be nice to have a longer conversation with his teachers about how his transition to the toddler room has gone. He seems really happy in his new room but I'll be curious to hear what his teachers say about the adjustment/how he's doing overall.
But today I'm sharing a reflection that was prompted by a lunch date this past week. Earlier this week, I had lunch with two former co-workers from a previous job. It was so fun to catch up with them. We got on the topic of travel as one of them (a recent empty nester!) is going to Spain in January so I was sharing insights from my Spain trip in 2016 (which feels like a lifetime ago!). The other co-worker told us about a high school friend of hers who is a "social media influencer" which basically means she earns a living by promoting brands on instagram/twitter, etc. This friend had planned to move around the world with her husband/children every 3 years. She started in Costa Rica and then moved to Spain but they are so happy there that they plan to stay there until their youngest daughter graduates from high school. My friend had gone to Mexico with this influencer last winter and the friend's entire trip was comped by the resort since she would be promoting the resort on social media.
My former co-worker said - "can you imagine that lifestyle and being able to travel for free?"
You know what I said? I said: "Honestly, that sounds awful!"
Who am I and what happened to my wanderlust? I used to plan my next trip before I was finished with the trip I was on. I took so many flights/year between work and personal travel that I always made at least silver status with Delta. This year, I've taken 2 flights total and only expect to take 2 more next week. And I'm not exactly looking forward to the flights I'll be taking next week for an off-site meeting as they will take me away from Paul and Phil.
I love looking at pictures of others trips on Instagram. In the past I probably felt a bit of envy or jealousy when I saw the awesome trips others were taking. Now when I see pictures, I think - that's really cool/beautiful, but I have no desire to be there right now.
I'm new to this whole mom thing so maybe I'll rediscover my wanderlust when Paul is older and an easier traveler. I know not all moms feel this way as I know plenty of moms who have traveled after having kids - both with and without their kids. I just have zero desire for that right now. And that's ok - just as it's ok to still have wanderlust as a mom! I tell myself that I lived the heck out of the years before I had Paul - I took lots of trips both domestically and internationally. That was a travel-heavy season of life, and this season is light on the travel. We take about 1 plane trip/year with Paul and so far both trips have been/will be to Florida where we won't do much sight seeing and will instead soak up the sun and surf during our bitterly cold winter. Life is just so different than it was several years ago!
I guess all this is to say that you never know how your life and your desires will change, and what will prompt that change. My wanderlust might come back when we are in a different season of life. But for now, I'm happy to live vicariously through others experiences and to ooh and ahh over their photos from the comfort of my couch! But you told the Lisa from 5 years ago that travel would be so, well, unappealing to her, I think she would have been really surprised!
Have you ever experienced a huge shift in your mindset about something like travel?
We all evolve, don't we? You have an awful lot on your plate these days but the biggest and best is your life with Paul. Of course being away would be hard. I suspect, since you have always loved to travel, you will again when Paul is older. But why worry on it now? You're so wise to just enjoy vicariously but not in envy.
ReplyDeleteThree cheers on your big day -- that's definitely putting a lot in one day! Well, good for you. And then, time to move! Congratulations!
I have no idea what will ACTUALLY happen once I have a kid in tow, but I do know that two of the coolest things I've seen traveling were a seven and ten year old gaily climbing Huayanu Pichu in Peru, and little kids at the Great Wall of China, totally awed. I remember thinking how cool that would be for them to experience at such a young age, but I imagine a 10+ hour flight probably wasn't too fun for anyone involved!
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on closing on your home!
I can totally understand the shift in thinking! While travel is great, I do think it ebbs and flows. You may not travel now, but I imagine it will come back later in life.
ReplyDeleteI hear you! I have loved traveling vicariously through my children who have traveled so much compared to me. I know at my age, I will never be able to travel to all the places you and your siblings have been to, so I really enjoy the pictures and stories you share about them.
ReplyDeleteTraveling isn't as fun as it used to be, and the airlines are not comfortable anymore, unless you fly first class, so I'm content to view everyone else's travels.
I always hated being away from my children when they were small, too.
I think this totally make sense. There are different seasons for everything in life and I think you're just enjoying motherhood, family and soon your new house for a while and there is nothing wrong with that! :)
ReplyDeleteLife is just a series of new obsessions. :) I think you did SUCH a good job of living it up when you were single and you enjoyed every ounce of your singlehood. And now, you're in a different stage of life and have different priorities. That's what I try to tell myself: enjoy this moment now because, hopefully, one day, my life will be massively different and there won't be as much time for naps and alone time and reading 125+ books a year, haha.
ReplyDeleteI have a feeling your wanderlust will come back when you have older kids and traveling with them is easier. And it will be a NEW kind of wanderlust since it will be about showing them the world and seeing it through their eyes. :)
I feel somewhat similar, though I probably have a little more wanderlust than you these days. I just feel like our life is in a huge state of flux as we try to have a second child so planning trips is difficult. Otherwise I would love to plan a trip for next year as I do enjoy going on one trip a year still. But I think, like you, our style of traveling has changed. Our Bend trip last year was great. I loved having Olivia along. I definitely don't feel the need for a trip away from her right now, like I did at the end of our maternity leave. She's at such a fun age and is so fun to be around. But obviously 1-2 trips per year with a toddler is pretty much the max we can handle!
ReplyDeleteI think we will get our major wanderlust back one day, but it makes sense it's not there at this stage of life.
I have had so many massive shifts in mindset over the course of my life, that I really wonder if we become completely different people at different points in our lives. I haven't had a big shift when it comes to travel, but I have when it comes to almost everything else.
ReplyDeleteIf I had kids, I'd totally want to live a little house on the prairies-type of life, haha! I don't think I'd want to go anywhere, and I'd want to live in the country with animals, and a big garden, and start canning food for the winter, hahaha. I'd also want to be a stay at home mom. I think life takes us in directions we never even dreamed of, and it's fun to embrace wherever we end up.