100th Celebration + More About My Grandma

We had a great time celebrating my grandma’s 100th birthday! We got to my parents around lunchtime on Friday. It was a cool, windy day so not a good lake day (my parents live on a lake). By the end of the day it had warmed up enough that it was nice out back. Phil and I have an ongoing disagreement about what is considered the front and back of my parents lake home. For me and my family, the ‘front’ of the house is the part that faces the lake; the ‘back’ faces the road. 

Playing with nana’s new bubble toys!

The 6 of us went out for an anniversary dinner at one of our favorite spots in the town my parents live near - Battle Lake. The boys did well all in all. 

Saturday was all about celebrating my grandma! I went to the church where her party was in the morning to help get the space set up/help with food prep. I was glad I could get a photo with my grandma before people arrived! 

My beautiful grandma and me

My grandma and her 3 living children. My dad Paul (my son’s namesake), the eldest, is on the left. She had 4 children but my aunt Betty died from cancer nearly 10 years ago. 

Phil stayed back at the house with the boys and brought them after Will’s nap. They were confused by the ‘party’. Most of the birthdays they’ve attended have been at parks. Luckily there was a ‘wiggle room’ at this church with lots of toys so they hung out there. I am glad I had an hour at the party to mingle before they arrived. 

They did enjoy the birthday desserts - cake and cupcakes!

After the party, my grandma headed back to her home at an assisted living center (she was exhausted!) and we had a little after party at a restaurant. It was nice to get some extra time with extended family. 

We left Sunday morning so we could get home for Will’s nap and to tackle laundry, groceries, etc. It was a very short trip - less than 48 hours - but it was worth it to be there for my grandma’s celebration. 

In my last post, some of you asked some questions about my grandma, so here are the answers, plus a couple I added! 

Have I observed anything that explains her longevity?

I think it mostly comes down to genetics. Although I will say she has always been careful about sun exposure which I think is a large part of why she looks so amazing! It was not ‘in fashion’ to be tan when she was growing up like it was for my generation. She also did a lot of walking for exercise. She would walk every day with a friend. Lastly, she loved puzzles and was an avid scrabble player so she kept her mind active. I’ve only beat her at scrabble once in my life!!

Does she live independently?

She lived independently with my grandfather until he passed away in 2009. The next year she moved into an apartment but was incredibly lonely so she moved into assisted living after a year in that apartment and has been there for the last 10+ years. Initially she said she was not interested in the social events but she quickly became the social butterfly of the community. Her favorite activity is Wii bowling. 

Is she in good health?

Overall I would say she is in good health, all things considered. She has never had a joint replacement and has only started to complain about joint pain in the last several years which is impressive! She has had high cholesterol and blood pressure for most of her life but it’s controlled by medications. 

Her mind is incredibly sharp. Last summer when we visited her, she asked Phil about the recent increase in interest rates and how it was impacting our work. Phil could not believe she still pays attention to things like interest rates! What is most impressive to me is how she has adapted to today’s technology. She’s active on Facebook and I introduced her to wordle last year - she plays every day. She also emails which is the primary way I keep in touch with her. 

Her biggest issue is that she has horrible macular degeneration. She’s nearly blind as a result and can no longer do many of her favorite things like read, crochet or work on crossword puzzles. Even watching tv is hard but that doesn’t prevent her from watching college and professional football. She is a HUGE Vikings fan and follows the team very closely. We kept hoping the Vikings would make it to the superbowl again in her lifetime but it seems unlikely. 

How does she feel about turning 100?

When we saw her around her birthday last year, she told us she did not aspire to turn 100. I think she would be happy to peacefully pass away at this point. My grandpa died 14 years ago and while she has endured that loss with such grace, I know she misses him dearly. They had this magical marriage. I never saw them exchange a cross word and I spent A LOT of time with them. They traveled around the country in their motorhome and would memorize poetry together; then they would recite poems for the family. She said that every time she made a meal for my grandpa he would say, ‘Janet, that was so good!’ He’d say it even if she had prepared something simple and he genuinely meant it. 

Aside from losing her husband, she’s lost all of her and my grandpa’s siblings, lots of extended family and nearly all of her friends have died. She also lost my aunt to cancer 10 years ago. I don’t think any parent would want to outlive their children. I certainly don’t. 

To wish for her to continue to live would be selfish on my part. So my wish for her is that she peacefully passes. I will be sad, of course, but feel incredibly lucky that she got to meet Phil and saw me become a mom/met my boys. I think she’s squeezed everything she could out of life and had a meaningful impact on mine. She knows how much I adore her and how I treasure the memories we made so there’s nothing left unsaid - which is such a gift. 

Wow, what a heavy end to a post - but as I get older, I’m working on increasing my comfort level with the end of life, especially when it’s not untimely.