On Being Home

My trip home last weekend was so wonderful, but was such a whirlwind experience for me.  I combined a day of work, which included a client event and a client meeting on opposite sides of the Twin Cities, a day of networking which included 5 meetings, I helped Phil move and settle into his new home, got my taxes done, visited a friend on Saturday afternoon, had dinner with 6 friends on Saturday evening, and after dinner I made a cameo at an engagement party that Phil attended so I could see his friends for a bit. 

Phew.  It was a lot to fit into about 3 days.  But that is how these trips always go.  And despite the fact that I fit a lot in, there are still things I didn't get a chance to do and people I didn't get a chance to see.  Of course the fullness of my life in Minneapolis and the fact that I have more people to see than I have time to see is a blessing, I just wish I was better at not feeling guilty about not seeing as many people as I would like.  Maybe this feeling of guilt is something that people who move away from home get better at managing, but it's a challenge for me. I also have had to learn to accept that trips home either need to be entirely friend-centric or family-centric.  Because my family and friends live in different areas of Minnesota, it's darn near impossible to combine the two unless I am home for a week, which is rare.

All that said, it was a wonderful trip home.  The temperatures were bitterly cold as the high for my time at home was a whopping 3 degrees, but I did not complain or care because there is nothing like being surrounded by my favorite people in a city I love.  I feel like a better version of myself when I am in Minneapolis and it's almost like I let go of a breath I've been holding for months when I land in Minneapolis. Of course the flip side of that is the tears that start when I board my flight back to Charlotte and often don't end during the entire flight, as was the case on Sunday.  Yes, I am that girl that cries on airplanes, probably attracting the attention of seatmates. 

As of today, I have 5 weeks until I hit the one-year mark of my move to Charlotte.  I know that seems soon to some people, because I keep hearing that over and over, but to borrow from a comment that my friend Nilsa made a couple of weeks ago, telling me that my time in Charlotte is almost over is like standing at the 20th mile of a marathon and telling runners that they are almost done (which is the cardinal sin of spectating, by the way).  Except it's worse in my case because it's like I'm at the 20th mile, except when I hit 26.2, the course marshal is saying, "actually, you are not done.  I know you are exhausted but you are going to need to continue to run for an indeterminate amount of time." 

So in the mean time, I'm praying, crossing my fingers and doing whatever I can to ensure that there will be a one-way ticket out of Charlotte in my future.  Each trip home is a taste of how good and full my life will be and I have to believe that I'll find my way back there.  Some way, some how.