Wish List

My birthday is less than a month a way! Eeks! In case you can't tell, birthdays are kind of a big deal in my world... I am not obnoxious about mine (at least I don't think I am?), I just think they are a special day! I really don't need anything for my birthday, but here is a little wish list of mine!

I think this apron from Anthropologie is adorable. Really, any apron from there is adorable. I think every girl should own an Anthro apron. If you enjoy cooking and don't own one - treat yourself to one!


While we are in the kitchen, check out this adorable plate. It's perfect for a Francophile like myself - and the name of the plate is actually "Francophile Dinner Plate, Eiffel Tower." I think it'd be a fun plate to serve desserts off of - like possibly some fancy pink macaroons! They are typically made with almond flour, so are gluten free. Hip hip hooray! I will definitely be treating myself to some next month in Paris - probably at Laduree!!

When I attended a knife skills class in October (which I still need to tell you about!), the instructor said you shouldn't feel like you HAVE to buy a block of expensive knives. He suggested investing in a high quality chef knife, paring knife, and serrated knife. With these 3 knives, you can do anything! That day I purchased a Wusthof chef knife (which I love) - now I'd like to add a paring knife to my collection!








I have one Pampered Chef rubber spatula, but I would like another one! I think they are the best spatulas out there. I use mine to make eggs every day and it has not melted one bit (my other cheaper version did!).


I really fell in love with Julia Child when I read My Life in France, so I would love to own her cook books. I think her recipes are a bit out of my league but hopefully some day I could successfully execute one of her recipes! I'd also love to receive Around My French Table or any of Ina Garten's cookbooks!
Last, but not least, I'd love to expand my collection of cloth bound Penguin Classics! I received Little Women and Jane Eyre for Christmas, but would love to own them all eventually. Aren't they so pretty?

So that's what's at the top of my wish list these days! And really, if I didn't receive a single gift for my birthday, I really wouldn't care. I'm just looking forward to celebrating with friends/family - and heading to Paris for a week! What's on your wish list these days? And when is your birthday?

Ten on Tuesday

Another set of questions from the lovely Chelsea of Roots and Rings!

1. Is there a band/artist that you HATE?
Hate is a strong word, but I strongly disliked Michael Jackson. Yes, he was the King of Pop, but I think he did some pretty questionable/icky things...

2. What do you do when you get a gift that you do not like? How do you react?
I can't even think of a gift that I've received that I didn't like... I am pretty easy to please, though! If I didn't like something, though, I would probably just pretend I did as I would never want to hurt the gift giver's feelings...

3. How is your work office/cubicle decorated?
Decorated? Not. at. all. I don't have a single personal effect at work. No pictures, nothing. I used to have photos of my 4 nephews but then people kept asking me if they were my kids - to which I said:

"Seriously? Do I look like I've had 4 kids that closely spaced? Wait, don't answer that..."

4. Do you use all of your vacation every year?
Hells yes! I would like to try to carry over a bit next year as it's nice to have a little cushion at the end of the year in case you get sick. This year I had a whopping 4 hours left as of December 1st... I didn't use those, so carried them over and will use them later this month when I visit Nora.

5. Did you have a real or fake Christmas tree?
Fake. My condo association does not allow real trees.

6. If you could have anything for dinner tonight, what would it be?
I would have shrimp cocktail and ceviche for an appetizer, followed by my mom's oven roasted chicken & mashed potatoes for the main course, followed by homemade chocolate pudding for dessert. Mmm... I realize those 3 courses are sort of disjointed but I don't care.

7. Do you bite your fingernails?
Yes, sometimes... I've gotten better about this but it's something I do when I am stressed...

8. How many cups of coffee do you drink each day?
Somewhere between 1-3. It used to be 6, but then I started having trouble with acid reflux so I had to cut WAY back.

9. Do you have a nervous tick?
Nope, not that I know of... Are they common?

10. How often do you vacuum?
The high traffic areas of my condo have wood floor so I do not vacuum very often. The only room with carpet is my bedroom and I really am only in there to sleep so I don't think it 'needs' to be vacuumed that often. I vacuum it about once/month maybe?

Motivation Monday: A Running Meme

Last month, J of Morning Runner tagged me to answer these questions! They are running related so I figured they would tie in with "motivation Monday".

What are you most proud of accomplishing in 2010?

PR'ing at the Portland Marathon. I trained really hard for that race so it was wonderful to cross that finish line with a 28 minute PR!

What are your running goals for 2011?

I want to run a sub-2 hour half marathon in Fargo in May. I really think I have it in me to accomplish this!

What is your favorite race?

There isn't a race that I consistently do every year... A race I really enjoyed running was the Twin Cities 10 mile run which is ran on the day of the marathon. It's called the short cut to the capitol (the marathon concludes at the capitol). You get to sort of experience the buzz of marathon day so it's a cool race!

What is your favorite holiday guilty pleasure?

Drinking holiday beverages from Starbucks or Caribou Coffee. They are pricey and very caloric so I don't allow myself many!

What is your most embarrassing running moment?

Probably my disappointing half marathon that I ran in the spring of 2007. I was not at all prepared so was pretty miserable. My body was not in proper shape to run 13.1 miles and it revolted against me. I had a friend visiting from out of town and was too sick afterwards to entertain her. :(

I am terrible at coming up with people to tag, so either any some/all of the questions in the comments or do this on your blog!

Best Books of 2010

Let's switch gears and talk about something I haven't mentioned in awhile: reading. One perk of being single is that I sure read a heck of a lot more!

Last week, out of curiosity, I counted the number of books I read in 2010. The total? 50. Ufda. That is a lot of books. Do you wonder how I keep track? Goodreads.com, my friends. Do you love to read? If so, I highly recommend that website (I have no association with them, I just think it's an awesome way to keep track of what you've read and what you want to read). If you join, let me know so we can be friends!

After scanning through all those books, I thought I'd share my top 5 reads from 2010!

Sarah's Key by Tatiana de Rosnay - This was a heavier read. It's set in Paris during WWII and is about the round up of Jews living in Paris. The narration alternates between an American journalist who now lives in the apartment of a Jewish family that was sent to Auschwitz and Sarah, a child in the family that was sent to Auschwitz. When the family was rounded up, Sarah thought they would return to the apartment so she locked her little brother in a cabinet in an effort to save him. As a Francophile, it's probably not surprising that one of my favorite books from 2010 is a book that is largely set in France. It's definitely worth checking out! de Rosnay has a new book out, A Secret Kept, which I might buy and read while I am in Paris!

The Piano Shop on the Left Bank by Thad Carhart - Ahem. Yes, another book set in France makes the top 5 list... I really adored this book. I played piano growing up and absolutely love pianos. I loved this book because I learned so much about the history of the piano. I think the author told the story of the piano in an interesting way. Carhart gets to know the owner of a little Piano Shop in Paris and gets to see how the shop owner helps his patrons select pianos. This book makes me want to move to Paris so I can get to know the shop owners in the neighborhood I would inhabit. I know I will never really move to Paris, though, as I would miss my family too much, but this book let me vicariously live through Carhart's experiences. And it made me really want to buy a piano! When I buy a house, that will be my first major purchase!

American Wife by Curtis Sittenfeld - This was probably my favorite read for 2010. It's loosely based upon the life of George and Laura Bush. The author did a great job of capturing the spirit and mannerisms of the Bush's. It was a page turner and would be a great book club book as you could have a great discussion about whether or not you could/did marry someone with different political views.

Good Things I Wish You by A. Manette Ansay - This novel explores the relationship between Clara Schumann and Johannes Brahms, the protege of Clara's husband, Robert Schumann. It's a work of historical fiction and Ansay did a great job weaving together notes and photos from both the present and the past. The narrator of the book, Jeanette, is struggling with a divorce and while she tries to find out what really happened between Clara & Johannes, she starts dating someone and finds that her relationship parallels the relationship she is researching to some extent.

Sh*t My Dad Says by Justin Halpern - Since my other books were heavier books, I had to include one light/funny book. This might just be the funniest book I have ever read. This is the kind of book that you can not read in public, unless you want to look like a lunatic, because it will leave you laughing so hard, you may be in tears! I will warn you, the language is pretty crass/vulgar, but if you can get around that, you'll love this book. I can't wait to talk about this book when I see my younger sister later this month as she also read it and loved it!! I'm picturing us pulling out the book and reading sections to each other. Seriously, check it out!

What were your top reads for 2010?

2011 Goals

I'm a bit late on posting these, but better late than never! I don't usually do resolutions, but I do have some goals for 2011. Here's what I am hoping to accomplish!

• CFA, Level 1 - I will take the 1st CFA exam on June 4th. I almost didn't post about this for fear that I won't pass and then everyone who reads this will know... But I am not even letting myself think about the possibility of not passing. CFA stands for Chartered Financial Analyst; it's a rigorous course of study that will be super challenging, but it will really help me advance my career. Studying for this test will consume my life for the next 5 months... but the nerd in me is excited about it!
• Sub 2 hours - I am hoping to run a 1/2 marathon in less than 2 hours. My PR is 2:04 so I KNOW I can do it. I'll be running the Fargo 1/2 so hopefully I'll achieve this goal there where I know my parents will be cheering me on. If not, then I will just have to register for some more races in the summer and fall.
• Texting while driving - I have this nasty little habit of texting while driving. It needs to stop. Nothing I have to say is THAT important. Enough said.
• Letting go, looking forward - I'm just going to say that 2010 really, really sucked for multiple reasons. I want to focus on letting go and setting my sights ahead on the future. At this point, I do not feel I will gain anything by re-playing the events of the year past over in my mind. Maybe when the pain I've experienced isn't so fresh, I can re-visit those memories and learn something. But for now? I need to just let it go.
• Green monster - I tried having a Green monster last summer when I was training for the marathon but I just wasn't sold on it... I think I need to play around with the ingredients a bit... So I am hoping to experiment and come up with a flavor combination that I love! When/if I find one, I'll be sure to share it with you. And for all you green monster lovers out there, I'm open to suggestions! (I tried one with peanut butter this summer and I think that is the ingredient that killed it for me...)

What are your goals for 2011?

Looking Ahead

First off - thank you so much for all the sweet, kind, encouraging comments. One good part about going through something difficult is that I am reminded how many amazing people I have in my life!

Yesterday's post was a heavy one... Yes, I am sad and I miss the Barrister, but luckily, I have so much to look forward to. 2010 was a tough year for me - both professionally and personally. I was not sad to ring in the new year. But I am hopeful and believe that 2011 holds great things for me.

So I will take my eyes off the rear view mirror of life. I will work on letting go of all that happened in 2010. Luckily, I've got lots of exciting things to look forward to:

• Sister time. I'm flying down to Tucson over MLK weekend to visit my sister Abby and and her husband. I can't wait to thaw out and see the sun! While I'm there, we'll drive up to Phoenix and visit one of my best friends who had a baby in December. I can't wait to meet my faux niece, Elle!


• Meet Me in St Louis. Days after the break-up, I bought an inexpensive plane ticket to visit Nora! I'll head there the last weekend of January. I can't wait to discover her city, meet her mom and dad, enjoy some Mexican food, and maybe take in the penguin exhibit at the zoo!


• 30. On February 6th, I'll exit my 20s, and enter my 30s. I'm still struggling to wrap my mind around this as I don't feel like I should be turning 30. Ready or not, though, here it comes. I'm having a French-themed 30th birthday party (of course, what else would you expect from a Francophile like me) and am looking forward to celebrating with family and friends!


• An American Girl in Paris. The week after my birthday, I'll fly to Paris where I'll spend 8 fabulous days! I'm renting an apartment in the Marais and will chronicle my journey on my France blog. Hopefully you'll hop over there and follow along (I'll remind you of the address when we are closer to my departure).


• Cherry Blossoms. In April, I'll head to DC to run the Cherry Blossom run with Charbelle! I'll be staying with Becky! Mandy is meeting up with us as well, and Charbelle is staying with Jess, so it will be quite the blogger meet-up!!
  

The first 4 months of the year will fly by with all the trips! I heart traveling so am so excited!

What are you looking forward to in 2011?

Why...

The Saturday before Christmas, I sat on the Barrister’s couch while he made us a cappuccino – a tradition of ours. The song “Why” by Annie Lennox played on XM radio as he busied himself boiling the coffee and frothing the milk.

Truth be told, I had been struggling in the relationship for the past couple of weeks. As I sat there, the lyrics from this song resonated with me:

Why can’t you see this boat is sinking

Due to the Barrister’s work travel schedule, we had spent a lot of time apart in December. Friends and family had encouraged me and said, “Distance can make the heart grow fonder.” They told me stories of how time apart strengthened their relationship. They grew closer as a result. They grew stronger as a result. I clung to these words and hoped it would be the case as the Barrister would be traveling every week from December – mid-May.

But when we were apart, I felt so lonely. It was so hard on me when we were apart, but it didn’t seem to bother the Barrister – or if it did, he couldn’t find the words to tell me. On this cold December morning, as that sad Annie Lennox song played, tears filled my eyes and spilled over onto my cheeks and I cried in front of him for the first time and told him how hard it was for me when we were apart.

Let’s go down to the water’s edge
And we can cast away those doubts
Some things are better left unsaid
But they still turn me inside out

This display of emotion prompted other conversations throughout the weekend. Conversations about what I wanted out of a relationship. Conversations about priorities and careers and family. Conversations that confirmed what I had began to fear over the past weeks – that we were not right for each other.

This is the book I never read
These are the words I never said
This is the path I’ll never tread
These are the dreams I’ll dream instead
This is the joy that seldom spread
These are the tears…
The tears we shed
This is the dread
These are the contents of my head

I was filled with a sense of dread, but I knew what I needed to do. I cared very deeply for the Barrister, but we have different relationship needs/expectations. I really wanted him to be the one, but I knew I deserved more. So on the Monday before Christmas, we parted ways. There is no “good time” for a break up, but the week of Christmas is a pretty craptastic time. However, I didn’t think it would be right to pretend everything is ok just because it was Christmas when I knew in my heart that we should not be together.

I don’t blame his travel schedule for the break up – I think it just put a magnifying glass to some flaws in our relationship.

I’m proud of myself for choosing to walk away – for putting my wants and needs first and recognizing that we were not right for each other, and that our differences were irreconcilable. In the short term, it would have been easier to stay with him as I did love spending time with him. In the long run, though, I would have been short changing myself.

It’s been a tough couple of weeks, but it gets better each day. While our relationship may seem brief to some people, I fell hard and I fell fast. I did not talk about him much on this blog but he was a very big part of my life for the last 3+ months.

I have no hard feelings towards the Barrister. We ended things before any feelings of anger or resentment had a chance to develop. I still care for him and wish our story would have ended differently.

Why is a question I have asked myself a lot over the past weeks.

Why do I keep getting my heart broke? Why do others seem to find their true love so easily and at such a young age while I continue to struggle through these break ups. Why does it have to hurt so much?

Tell me…
Why

But I just spin in circles when I ask questions like these. I am working on accepting the fact that I don't have all the answers.

But when I find myself feeling down, I pull up this quote found on this lovely blog.



And it gives me hope.

* Lyrics are from Why by Annie Lennox...