This is one of those posts that should have a subtitle of "keepin' it real." I read several other posts like this from other bloggers last year, like Caroline's post last fall and really appreciated the honesty of the posts.
Most of us tend to focus on the good and positive aspects of our life but it can sometimes paint an unrealistic picture of an effortless, issue-free life. Yes, I love my life and am very happy with where I am today, but that doesn't mean there aren't things I struggle with... So in an effort give you the full story of my life, here are some things that I struggle with.
1. Saying yes to the right amount of things. Hi, my name is Lisa and I am an over-planner. I over-planned my life this fall to the extent that I wasn't really enjoying the plans I was making which defeats the purpose of making plans at all. I have a hard time saying no to things because it makes me feel guilty and selfish. I am very fortunate to have so many opportunities to say yes to as I have a diverse group of friends (college friends, work friends from past and current jobs, grad school friends, run club friends, Phil's friends, blog friends, etc) but I have to figure out how to say yes to less so I don't feel bogged down by my schedule. This has become more challenging now that I am in a relationship as in my single days I would make plans to see friends 3+ days a week and that was fine, but now that Phil is in my life, I want and need to carve out time for the two of us and I also need some alone time on top of all of that.
2. Being in a different stage of life than most of my friends. Let me preface this struggle by saying that I am so very happy that my friends lives have taken the direction they have. But sometimes it is hard to be in such a different place in life than most of my friends (i.e. most are married and have children). We have less that we are able to relate to in each others lives because the source of our struggles are different and we probably each romanticize what the other person's life is like. All this is not to say that it's not possible to have close friendships with people who are in a different stage of life, because I do not think that is the case at all... It has just gotten more challenging for me as I get older and the gap between our day-to-day life experiences widens.
3. Figuring out my career. I've worked so hard over the last 8+ years to get my MBA and become a CFA Charterholder. But sometimes (OK, many days lately) I wonder why I worked so hard to arrive on a career path that has left me feeling unfulfilled lately. I'm not going to give up on a career in finance as I know that some of my dissatisfaction I've felt in my last couple of roles has been strongly influenced by the work environment, but I am struggling to figure out where exactly I fit in the finance world.
4. Not comparing my relationship to others. Eleanor Roosevelt said it best when she said, "comparison is the thief of joy." For the most part, no good comes of comparing our lives to others but it's something I am guilty of, especially when it comes to relationships. It isn't a healthy exercise because each relationship is as unique as the two people that form the relationship.
I could go on and include other things like sleep, being patient with others and myself, being in situations where I'm not in control, and the list goes on and on.
It's hard to write posts like this as they make a person feel vulnerable but I think it's important to mix in a dose of reality because I'd hate for anyone to read my blog and come away thinking that I live an easy life or have it all figured out because that is so far from the truth!
What do you struggle with?