Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Good-bye antibiotics, hello surgery... and accepting help...

Thank you for all the kind comments and suggestions on last week's wine & love post.  Since I mentioned that I had an appointment, I figured I would give you an update.  I saw my ENT on Friday, and as I suspected, he said surgery is our best option at this point.  It's just a day procedure and the recovery is allegedly not too bad, although my doctor did warn me that it's different for every person.  Some bounce back in a matter of days, some need a week.  I am hoping I am on the 'couple of days' end of the spectrum.  I do not have time to be out of commission for a week...

My surgery will be on January 20th as that is the earlier I could get it.  I had mentioned that I might need surgery at Thanksgiving and my sister-in-law kindly volunteered to help me out.  But when the scheduler told me I'd have to be the hospital at 6:15 am for pre-op my initial thought was:  "Yikes, that is early.  There's no way I can ask my SIL to be at my condo that early, I will just take a cab to the hospital."

After talking to my mom, it sounds like she'll be able to come down and take me to/from surgery and spend that first night with me, so I won't need to take a cab.  And really, I am sure my SIL would have taken me to there, I just HATE asking people to do things for me.  Especially when it's an extreme inconvenience to someone.  I just hate feeling like an 'obligation' to others, but this is something I need to work on, because we all need to ask for help now and then.  And the thing is, I have no problem helping others, and I don't see them as an 'obligation', so this is clearly a thought pattern I need to work on.  

I am actually really looking forward to surgery.  No, I would not choose to be in the position to need surgery, but I am tired of taking course after course of antibiotics and not seeing any results.  I'm tired of being sick.  When someone asks me how I feel, I want to be able to say I feel great.  But soon enough all of this will be behind me and I will be back on the road to full health!

Are you good at asking for and accepting help from others?  

32 comments:

Kelly (She Wears a Red Sox Cap) said...

Aww I'm glad your mom will be coming! There is nothing like a mom to take care of you :) I'm okay at accepting help if people volunteer but I am terrible at asking for help. I think its a female thing haha.

Becky said...

So glad you can get this and that the problem will be taken care of! I think it can be hard to ask for help when you're such an independent person too, like you are. Definitely work on your mindset because even though it's an easy procedure, you will need help after surgery and you shouldn't be afraid to ask for it!

Amber @ A Little Pink in the Cornfields said...

That will be so nice to have your mom there. There really isn't anyone better than your mom in a time like this, right?

There are certain people that I don't mind asking help from. People like my mom, dad and sister spring to mind. My mom is the first person I always go to.

I'm like you though, and hate to be an inconvenience, although I know I spring to helping others right away and usually don't mind. I think this is something that I need to work on though, because I over-extend myself and then I get really upset when the favor isn't returned to me.

This is going to sound so selfish, but I'm so glad that you will still be able to make it to Winter Rumpus. At least we'll have this nice relaxing weekend before your surgery and not after!

Raquelita said...

It's great that your mom will be there to help you that first night. I hope that your recovery from the surgery is swift and easy.

I find it hard to ask for help from most people, but there are a few people that I know will always help me and who I have helped as well. When there has been a lot of give and take in a relationship or friendship, I think that makes it easier for me to ask for help.

abbi said...

I hate asking others for anything like that either - I'm sure everyone would have been happy to help you out but I understand!

Marisa A. said...

As you well know, I'm not either. Perhaps this is something we can work on together! Haha.

Erin said...

I'm so sorry you're going through this! I hate asking for help, too. It will be worth it when you can feel GREAT again!

AshleyD said...

I really hope the surgery helps! I can't imagine being sick for that long!

missris said...

Aww I'm sorry you have to have surgery, but hopefully that will solve the problem once and for all. I'll cross my fingers for you!

Carolina John said...

Ugh I had sinus surgery back in 2003 and it was the worst thing ever! Actually the worst part of it was that the sinus problems showed up again about 6 months later. I didn't have to get "packed", which was lucky. But they did fix a deviated septum which required two big plastic stents to be shoved up my nose. Not fun at all. But I was surprised how far up in there the plastic went. I think the recovery took me about 3 days. They go in there with a hammer and chisel.

Marlys said...

Carolina John's entry gave me the chivers! I pray you don't have a deviated septum! I'm glad I can be there - just wouldn't seem right to spend that day by yourself! We all need a little TLC when we have surgery of any kind! I, too, have a hard time asking for help!

jdotzenrod said...

I would of totally drove you! But I am sure it will be nice for your mom to be able to stay with you. Especially since you don't know how you will recover. If you need anything after she leaves let me know!

qwerkyqook said...

Moms are essential after surgery...especially for me. Anesthesia and I do not get along. I'm glad a resolution is coming! It will be nice to whip those sinuses back into shape :)

B and B said...

I am glad you are able to take care of this with surgery.

I am glad your mom can be there with you. You will need to have some Mom's chicken soup TLC those first days after surgery.

imlivinginadream said...

I don't blame you for opting for surgery! Being sick for so long is just crazy. Good luck lady!

Leigh said...

I know it sucks being down and out, but hopefully this surgery will mean you are back feeling 100% again! Asking for help isn't fun, but I am glad your mom is coming down to help you :)

Amy --- Just A Titch said...

I'm glad your mom is coming. Moms are the best.

And I'm the worst at asking for help. The worst ever.

Nora said...

Will be, in it's own odd way, great to have the surgery. I am hoping and praying that the recovery time is quick and that it takes care of your problem once and for all! Will be thinking of you and of course if you need anything, I'm here! (Or can try to be there!)

I suck at asking other people for help, mostly as I don't want to inconvenience others or admit defeat. I guess I should work on that too...!

Stephany said...

I am hoping and praying this surgery does the trick. I hate being sick and don't know if I could have handled going through all you've been through! And I'm super happy your mom will be helping you the first day. Mom's are the BEST at that. :)

Jess said...

So happy it's all going to work out for you! And, so happy that your mom is going to be able to help you out! Nothing better than having Mom around when you're feeling sick or recovering from surgery!

Here's to not having to take any more useless antibiotics!

Jolene - EverydayFoodie said...

Sounds like you have a wonderful family. I am terrible at accepting help from others besides the hubby. I rarely do it.

J said...

Aww well hopefully the surgery will go well and you will feel better. I do have a little bit of trouble asking people for help. I don't want them to feel bad and be an inconvenience. But I do always try to offer to help my friends because I know they may not be comfortable asking for help. My friend is getting married and I keep telling her that I am here for anything she needs! Hopefully she will take me up on my offer!

Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks said...

We are so alike, it's becoming comedy. I used to be JUST LIKE YOU ... had huge issues asking for help. Now, I'm still too stoic at times, but know that I can lean on certain people just as much as I expect them to lean on me.

I'm hopeful that this surgery provides you a boost in your health. Because, let's face it, you've had a loss in quality of life with all the sinus infections you've had lately!

Amber (Girl with the red hair) said...

I'm glad that you are getting this surgery, you NEED to be better!

I can be bad about asking for help sometimes. It really depends on what the issue is. I have NO problem asking Eric for help, especially when it comes to heavy lifting ;) And usually I am good about asking my parents for help too!

San said...

I think asking for help can be tricky. Some people constantly ask others for help (even if not necessary) and take advantage of others generosity, but I do believe that everybody should ask for help when they really need it.... and I am so glad your Mom will be with you right after surgery.
When something like that happens, I am still the little girl that thinks Mommy will make everything better :)

crystal said...

I hope the surgery goes well and you feel back to healthy normal afterwards. Let me know if you need anything, seriously!!

Shoshanah said...

I'm not good at asking for help as well. I always tend to feel guilty for doing it, and don't want people to feel obligated to do something for me. But you are right because it is silly and I know it's something I need to get over.

And on another note, I hope your surgery goes well and you can get back to normal. As sick as you've seemed to have been lately, I have to imagine you've been pretty normal. So hopefully this does the trick and gets you feeling better!

pinkflipflops said...

Horrible at asking for help. It's on my to do list if there is another baby. Goodluck with your surgery!

Lauren @ Sassy Molassy said...

What kind of procedure are they doing? I totally feel you on not wanting to inconvenience someone, but I also know that people WANT to help people who need help, especially when they are important people in our lives.

I would probably offer to cab it as well. However, it will feel nice and calming to have your mom there for you. Moms are the best. Hope your healing is speeeedy!

Kyria @ Travel Spot said...

I am so glad your mom will be there to help you. Sometimes you need help, even if you don't like the fact.

I am also bad at asking for help. I am not good at graciously accepting it either!

Jeanie said...

OK, I've been away from blogs for a bit and reading down posts. First of all, the parties (a different post) sound fun -- and what's wrong with cheese?!!! Everyone will devour your dish.

Surgery -- glad your mom is coming. If you have the opportunity to get a recliner, think about it. I've had the sinus surgery. The first i time the packing was in three days, and I had to sleep sitting up because I couldn't breathe otherwise. Last time only a day, still slept sitting up. (As I did for six weeks with shoulder surgery). That's when I decided that if I have to buy more chairs, I'm getting a recliner! The surgery isn't bad, but I'm glad your mom is there to help take care of you. You'll want someone to. Not painful, just exceedingly annoying for about 24 hours or so. Hang in there. The good news is that it does help -- a lot. I've had it done twice and both times had a noticable difference.

Jen said...

Good luck with the surgery! And I definitely think you'll appreciate having your mom there to drive you and stay with you that first night. It has been a while since I had the surgery, but I remember being laid up for several days. I was on pain meds, and your nose will be clogged for a few days too while everything heals and drains.