One week later...

Last Saturday at 10:30 a.m., I was sitting with my Grandpa at the hospital, hoping that by showing up, he knew how much he meant to me. How much I love him. How important he is in my life. But I didn't say any of that. I gave my Grandparents a Valentine's Day card and I think I wrote how much I love then & how they are such an important part of my life. After our short 40-minute visit, I hugged him and told him he needed to get better and that he gave us all quite the scare.

This Saturday at 10:30 a.m., my phone rang. I saw Mom's Cell on my caller ID. I thought - that is odd, we just talked last night so what could she possibly call me about? I had a bad feeling.

I answered the phone, and in a tearful voice, she just said, 'Oh, Lisa.' And I immediately knew. I knew she was calling to tell me that Grandpa had died.

He died very quickly. She was there - they tried to give him CPR but it was too late. My mom said he went quickly and wasn't in any pain. I do find comfort in knowing it was quick and as painless as possible. He lived a full life and was such an amazing man.

I have so many memories of him, but what I will remember most is the bond of love between my Grandparents. Out of all the couples that I know, their relationship is an example of what I hope to have someday. They were just so in love with each other and my Grandpa would always tell us that he was a lucky man to have met my Grandma.

I'm going home tomorrow so I can be with the family as we prepare for the funeral. All I can think about is - 'How will Grandma get through this?' Luckily, I have a very close-knit family, so Grandma will have plenty of love and support. And her strong faith in God will also get her through this.

I'm sure some people think it is odd to be blogging about this. But for me, blogging is so theapeutic for me. I always feel better after I get my thoughts down and push publish. So I am hoping that when I push 'publish post' in a few moments, that feeling of calmless will come over me...